Is It Good to Be Gifted? Optimal
IQ and the Flipside to Giftedness. by David Palmer, Ph.D.
Is it good to be a gifted? This
may sound like a strange question - of course being gifted is good... isn't it?
It's true that kids who score higher on IQ tests will have an advantage
academically. After all, these tests are designed to predict school success. The
skills tapped by IQ tests, including memory, problem-solving, and language
ability are also important for doing well on college placement tests and
succeeding in a career. So there's definitely an upside to being gifted. But how
gifted do kids need to be to reap these benefits - and is there a flipside to
having a high IQ?
Optimal IQ
It may seem reasonable to believe that the higher our IQ, the better off we are.
Yet, it turns out that's not necessarily true. Those with higher IQs will have
an advantage over those with lower IQs - all else being equal - when it comes to
ease of learning and having the cognitive skills necessary to succeed in certain
careers. However, researchers have found that beyond an IQ of about 120 there is
little relationship between IQ and personal achievement. (And please note that
an IQ of 120 does not even meet the cutoff score of 130 used by most districts
as selection criteria for entrance into a gifted education program.) Beyond this
level, achievement appears to be related more to things like creativity,
leadership ability, and personal motivation than to IQ. Those with extremely
high IQs (in the 145 to 180 range, for example) do no better than those with IQs
in the 120s when it comes to career success and creative accomplishments. And
having a higher IQ is certainly no guarantee that you'll zip through life
effortlessly accomplishing great things.
I've seen this myself. I've met many people who don't appear to be particularly
bookish or intellectual, but are very successful in what they do. Then again,
I've known lots of academic types who have scored extremely high on an IQ test
but lack the "people skills," personal motivation, or whatever it takes to
translate their abilities into outward signs of success - a college degree, a
rewarding career, a fulfilling family life.
Maybe you've noticed this, too. Consider people you know and admire for their
accomplishments - those who make everything look easy and always seem to be
getting ahead. It's likely that these people are not all "brainy" types. Rather,
most are probably of average intelligence but know how to use their abilities to
connect with and lead others, to stay focused on their goals, and to work hard
to get what they want.
Of course, that's not to say that those with an exceptionally high IQ won't do
well in life. Many do, and some of them contribute great things to our society
in part because of their unusually high intellectual ability. An exceptionally
high IQ may also be useful, or even necessary, in certain professions that
require more isolated cerebral types of work, such as theoretical physics or
mathematics.
So what is the optimal IQ? It's arguable, but some would say around 120 and no
higher than 145. Why? At this level, you'd reap most of the advantages of having
enhanced abilities in some areas but might be spared some of the potential
downside of being too "different" from the rest of the world.
The Flipside to Having a High IQ
Just as it's unfair and unrealistic to make generalized statements about any
group of people based on similar traits they share, we shouldn't oversimplify
our view on the effects of giftedness on children. In fact, having a high IQ
doesn't necessarily come with any particular disadvantages. The research in this
area is mixed, at best. And much of it is based on interviews or anecdotal
evidence, which makes it hard to come to any firm conclusions about the
findings.
Yet, all children are susceptible to struggles at some time in their development
and gifted children are no different. A common belief is that they are more
prone to certain developmental problems due to being perceived as different by
others, or because they see themselves as being out of touch with most of their
peers. And this makes sense. A primary need of most kids - and maybe, to a
lesser degree, of most s as well - is to "fit in." Anyone who's been through
school understands how important it is to dress like, act like, and be like
everyone else. Or at least like everyone else in your own little subgroup. We
seem to have a need to be folded into a crowd with whom we can share certain
interests - a social connection, an identity. Yet gifted kids are, by
definition, different, at least when it comes to certain skills or talents they
possess. Yes, giftedness is arguably a positive difference - at least from an
adult perspective - but a difference, nonetheless. For kids and teens, the
pressure to conform is often so great that any deviation from the norm can be
distressing. We've all heard terms like brain, nerd, geek or worse applied to
kids who seem too bookish, or too "into" school.
Of course, the potential for social problems is not unique to gifted kids; all
children are susceptible to teasing, bullying, or social isolation when they
don't fit in, for whatever reason. The school years can be tough for all
children. Gifted kids, though, do share some unique pressures and developmental
issues that others may not.
A Disconnect Between the Brain, the Body, and Emotions
Most six-year-olds look, act, and think like six-year-olds. They use
six-year-old words, think six-year-old thoughts, and react emotionally like
you'd expect a six-year-old to react. Gifted children, however, are often
described as showing "asynchronous development." That is, while much of their
development may be typical for their age (their size and emotional reactions,
for instance), cognitively they are out of sync. Gifted children's advanced
cognitive skills allow them to process what's going on around them at a
different level than most of their age peers. An outcome of this is a
sophisticated and heightened curiosity about what's going on in the world, and a
desire to "fill in the gaps" of their understanding.
All children are curious about the world and how it works. But for most, their
curiosity is satisfied by simple, concrete answers that allow them to move on to
other thoughts and emotions. They may see adults as the "experts" and not feel a
need to question or seek elaboration on the answers provided by them. Gifted
children, however, may not be satisfied with simple answers. These children
often have a need to delve deeper to satisfy their advanced awareness and
heightened curiosity.
For example, while most young children who lose a family pet may be satisfied
with parental reassurance such as, "Your hamster is going to Heaven to live with
his friends," a gifted child may not be content with such a simplistic response
and want more information before moving on: "What is Heaven?," "Why do we have
to die?" "Will you die someday?"
Gifted children may also have a tendency to want to discuss "adult" issues -
such as , spirituality, and the afterlife - at a deeper, more involved level
than most kids their age. Other potential topics may include sexuality, birth,
money, relationships, and divorce. While discussing these types of issues calmly
and openly is not necessarily detrimental to a child, there can be drawbacks. A
child who is excessively concerned about these things may become overly focused,
frightened, or "grossed out" by knowing too much about issues they lack the life
experience or emotional maturity to fully understand.
In short, there is a certain bliss in the innocence of childhood that may be
lost on gifted children who are enlightened too quickly concerning life's
mysteries.
Emotional Sensitivity
Gifted children are often thought to be more emotionally perceptive and
responsive than their peers. Some people have described them as having finely
tuned antennae when it comes to picking up and responding to emotional signals
that come from within themselves or from those around them.
Some researchers have reported that gifted children may:
* Be overly empathetic to other people's problems or situations. They might show
a tendency to make the problem their own, and mirror the moods or emotional
state of the person they are concerned about.
* Overreact to frustration, rejection, success, or any situation that triggers
an emotional response - for example, sobbing over an outwardly minor
disappointment.
* Be overly sensitive to criticism or disapproval, or respond strongly to minor
suggestions or comments about their work or performances.
* Worry too much about global situations such as poverty, war, and natural
disasters over which they have no control.
* Read too much into other people's comments or body language.
Friendships
Friendships are often based on similarities. We tend to connect with others who
are like us in some way. That is not to say that two people need to be clones of
each other to bond - differences are often what make a relationship interesting
and may be what initially attracts one person to another. But it's fair to say
that long-term relationships are often kept going because the people involved
are somehow similar. And arguably, mental similarities are one of the most - if
not the most - important ways that people connect and stay connected. We tend to
become close with those who think like us, not necessarily people who have the
same opinions or outlook, but rather those who understand our ideas and
perspectives, share similar interests, and with whom we can carry on a mutually
meaningful conversation. Children and teens form meaningful and lasting
relationships in much the same way.
A potential problem for gifted children is that they often think in a different
way than most of their age peers - those they are likely to spend a great deal
of time with. They have the physical appearance and probably the emotional
maturity of their classmates, but may have the vocabulary, interests, and
reasoning ability of those much older than themselves. They don't really fit
into either group. Consequently, developing meaningful friendships can be more
difficult for gifted children, and this problem can become more pronounced as
cognitive ability increases. Put another way, the pool of potential same age
"mental mates" shrinks as IQ rises. Self Esteem
While studies show that many gifted children have high global self-esteem (how
they feel about themselves in general) and high self-esteem when it comes to
academics, it is also known that they are not immune to having poor opinions
about themselves. Self esteem issues may be particularly troublesome for gifted
children who are prone to perfectionism - the desire to do everything just right
before one can be satisfied with the outcome. Realizing their own potential and
capabilities, these kids may get the feeling that they should be able to do just
about anything, and then become frustrated when they don't perform up to their
own expectations. For example, getting less than perfect grades, not making the
varsity sports team, or not winning an award for the best science project may
make the gifted child feel that he has let himself down. Self-esteem may also be
negatively affected when gifted kids feel that they are not measuring up to
other high-achieving students, or to adult mentors whom they see as role models
or intellectual equals.
Depression
Gifted children who are not able to live up to their own unrealistic or
perfectionist expectations, or those who feel alienated from the rest of the
world because of their intellectual differences, may develop feelings of sadness
or depression. This is particularly true for the highly gifted child or teen who
may develop the sense that the world they live in is a foreign land where
everyone thinks and acts differently than they do. As they get older, these
children may begin to question the meaning of a world that is seemingly run by
those whose values and interests are so different from their own.
Becoming caught up in academic competitiveness can also lead to depression and
other serious consequences. It is known, for instance, that suicide attempts
occur more frequently among young people who excel academically, are highly
creative, and attend highly competitive schools.
Ways Kids Cope
Gifted children are as diverse a group as any other, and no two children are
alike. How they navigate through the social world and cope with the stresses of
growing up may have more to do with individual personality traits, or the type
of emotional support they get from others, than with their IQ.
Yet there are some common themes when it comes to how gifted kids cope. Because
of the social isolation and negative feedback they may encounter, there is some
evidence that, as they get older and have more of these experiences, some gifted
children start to downplay their abilities, becoming guarded or holding back
when they are around children their own age. Others may disguise their abilities
in other ways - like focusing on nonacademic-related talents, or simply choosing
to isolate themselves from others kids, preferring to be alone or choosing the
company of adults.
Many though, as they mature and gain the insight that comes from experience and
maturity, learn to accept and appreciate their differences without any long-term
negative consequences.
Whether or not a child is dealing with any of the issues outlined in this
chapter, parents can help their kids through the school years by:
* Being there to listen, understand, and support them emotionally when they are
going through a stressful period.
* Providing them with opportunities to develop and explore their interests and
connect with others who hold similar interests.
* Avoiding pushing them to excel or compete - or excessively praising them for
their accomplishments. * Encouraging fun, playful activities and downtime.
Most importantly, research (and common sense) tells us that all children benefit
from having at least one caring, supportive adult in their lives who provides
structure, consistency, and a sense of unconditional love, warmth, and
encouragement.
Editor's Note: David Palmer's new book, Parents' Guide to IQ Testing and Gifted
Education: All You Need to Know to Make the Right Decisions for Your Child
(2006) is available online and through Barnes and Noble and other fine book
sellers.
About the Author:
David Palmer, Ph.D., is a
parent, award winning researcher, educational psychologist, and the author of
the newly released book, Parents' Guide to IQ Testing and Gifted Education: All
you need to know to make the right decisions for your child.
Source of this article:
www.goarticles.com
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